Twin Flames vs. Soulmates — What’s the Difference?

This took me a while to write - first, because it's mostly me and not Atlas translating and copywriting my thoughts, and also, it took some time to relive these memories after a while of trying to put it all behind. I share it now because I believe it's important in my own evolution and what has helped push me down the path towards Opulence Vision.

As a warning, this is a long post - to be honest, I mainly wrote it for myself in memory of a man that made such an impact on my life without knowing it.

Lately, I’ve been reflecting on the people who’ve had the biggest impact on my life—especially one person in particular who shifted everything. For a while, I truly believed he was my twin flame. I still feel that way, but I have been letting him go for years now.

Before I get into that story, I wanted to take a moment to explore the difference between soulmates and twin flames—two terms that get thrown around a lot, especially in the spiritual space.

There was a time I didn’t really understand the difference either, let alone heard of a twin flame or even believed in soulmates. But having loved a lot in life after my spiritual awakening, feeling it in my body, and witnessing how certain connections activate us differently has helped me understand it more deeply. These are just my interpretations and experiences of these terms that I have formulated in my life.

What Are Soulmates?

Soulmates are people we’ve shared soul contracts with over lifetimes. They’re the ones who come into our lives to offer love, comfort, growth, or even challenge—but usually in a way that feels supportive and stable. A soulmate relationship might feel easy, aligned, like a breath of fresh air. It might be a romantic partner, a best friend, or even a family member.

They’re not always meant to be in our lives forever, but the lessons they leave us with tend to be soft, empowering, and often wrapped in love.

What Are Twin Flames?

Twin flames, on the other hand, feel like something different entirely. The connection is deep, magnetic, and almost unexplainable. It can feel like you’re meeting a part of your soul in another person—like someone who mirrors your essence, your shadows, your light, and your deepest wounds.

From what I’ve experienced and studied, twin flames come into our lives not just to love us—but to wake us up. They challenge us to evolve, to shed everything that isn’t real, and to become the version of ourselves that we were always meant to be.

It’s not always a smooth ride. Twin flame dynamics can be chaotic, full of push and pull, longing, and deep inner work. Some people are meant to reunite in this lifetime. Others go through separation and continue their paths individually.

My Own Twin Flame Journey

When I think about my Twin Flame journey, I can’t help but think about The Matrix.

Neo and Trinity weren’t just lovers—they were activators for each other. Together, they escaped the illusion, and became who the system feared the most: two awakened souls in sacred union.

In many ways, I feel like that’s what the Twin Flame journey is meant to do in our world. To wake us up from the systems we’ve been plugged into—corporate structures, consumerism, factory farming, jobs that drain our life force—and to remind us of who we really are, what really matters, and how powerful we become when we reunite our divine masculine and feminine energies.

When you unplug from the Matrix, you begin to see just how much of your energy was being harvested by things that don’t actually align with your soul.

That’s what happened to me.

My Story

For the past five years, I’ve tried to forget about him—and the connection we shared—as a way to move on. But lately, he’s been on my mind more than ever, and I feel like it’s finally time to express what his presence meant to me, and how deeply it impacted my life.

I know he had his own experience, and that his feelings may not have mirrored mine… but I also know—without a doubt—that something in him was stirred. Something he couldn’t fully explain… and maybe still can’t forget, even if he tries.

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In 2012, I was riding the high of my spiritual awakening—newly single, living with a fire-spinning artist, and surrounded by a vibrant chosen family. Life was truly a movie - I felt like I was on top of the world, and I carried myself accordingly, with genuine love in my heart for everyone.

We met at my cousin's wedding reception - it was the first time my family had seen me since that whole life transformation over the past year. I was the most confident I've ever been, and I was connecting with everyone better than I ever have. As I sat down at the table, I looked across the banquet hall, and I saw the most beautiful man I've ever seen before then. He literally took my breath away.

Please note, it wasn't his appearance that I fell in love with - I actually didn't think it was going to go very far - at first, I just thought he was going to be this pretty boy from a wealthy family that I had nothing in common with. I totally judged him at first, thinking we were not going to have anything to talk about, or have the same values. But as I got to know him more, and see more of him, I found myself wrong on that account. Every time we met, we couldn't get enough of each other, but as time went on, those meetings became fewer and further in between.

During dinner, between courses, guests began to wander — some mingled from table to table, others posed at the photo booth, and many gathered at the bar, already in celebration mode. I took the chance to slip away for a quiet moment to myself. The wedding was held at a stunning country club, complete with a lush garden and open courtyard. I wandered outside and found the largest tree I could, grounding myself beside it as I looked up at the night sky. A blanket of stars shimmered overhead, with the full moon casting its soft, ambient glow across the grounds — it felt like nature was setting the scene for a truly magical night. Everything around me felt enchanted — the sky, the garden, and the softly lit hall across the walkway, where joy-filled guests moved gracefully in their gowns and suits.

I thought about my most recent ex, and took that moment to finally let him go - I started to cry, yes at the wedding reception, I started to cry - at first out of sadness, because I genuinely missed him so much, but then the cry turned into gratitude. I let go of any resentment or anger I had, and any guilt that I was also carrying, transmuting that energy into something that felt like gratitude and hope mixed together. At the end of this cathartic moment, I remember putting my hands on the tree, looking up in the sky, with my eyes filled with tears, and I started to intuitively and sinerely cry out "Thank you, thank you, thank you" - to the Universe, and to everything around me.

When I regained my composure, eyes still glazed and dewy with tears, I started to walk back to the party. As I was walking back, there he was with his friend, walking towards me down the courtyard. I could feel him lock eyes with mine as we walked towards each other, smiles on both our faces without even knowing why - I noticed my heart beat faster and harder as he came closer.

"Where did you come from?" was the first thing this man ever said to me as our energies collided in the courtyard.

"I was just out in the garden by the trees, looking up at the stars. You never get to see them like that in the city, it's so beautiful!" Is what I said back to him, and he greeted that response with the most genuine smile I've ever seen in my life. This is where he introduced himself and his friend to me, and where I dazzled both of them at the time. After that meeting, I walked back into the party, and started to socialize with my family.

That night was the best night I've ever had with my family - I was able to be the most authentic with them, I stood up to my older guy cousins with grace and love, and they respected me for it, I partied with my girl cousins and deepened our friendships, and spoke to all my aunts and uncles despite our language barriers. And all the while, having constant positive exchanges with this gorgeous man - at the photobooth, at the bar, and on the dance floor. It was as if we kept drawing ourselves into each other.

While I was driving my parents home after the wedding, my dad looked over at me, and asked if I had ever met him before, if maybe we had gone to school together (I went to the same high school as my cousin). I told him no, that was the first time I met him, and I asked him why he was asking.

"It looked like you two knew eachother from a long time ago - I liked the way he looked at you," my dad responded with another genuine smile that I received that night. A response that has been echoing in my heart since that day.

The Connection

What we shared was deeper than attraction. It felt like remembrance. Like my body had known him before my mind ever did. Even now, years later, I carry the memory of that connection not as something I long for, but something that taught me what’s possible when love transcends logic.

As I said, I really didn't think it was going to go further than a couple of meetings with each other - we came from completely different worlds and he was considerably younger than me. But as I started to peel back the layers of who he was and what he's done in his life, I started to see how we mirrored each other without even knowing each other. I discovered how down-to-earth, open-minded, loyal and loving he was. I saw the boy that was trying everything to get his father's approval, but above that, I saw the man that he was striving to be, and the man he had the potential to become. He looked like a goddamn superhero - and not just the way he looked, but in his kindness, consideration, generosity, and his dedication to his family.

He started his own bakery specializing in gluten-free baked goods around the same time I attempted to do the same (we even used the same packaging), we both understood the veil of society and knew there was something deeper underneath, and he had the exact vaporizer that I shared with my ex-fiance - this doesn't seem like such a big thing, except for me, it meant so much. He actually gave me this vaporizor the last time he came to see me many years later, and that's how I knew our time was coming to a close.

The first time he came over to my apartment, we had just returned from a walk around the neighborhood. As we stepped into my room away from my roommate and whoever else was there, he then pulled me in close — and the moment our bodies met, something clicked. It felt like magic. Like electricity. Our skin felt magnetized to each other, each point of contact humming with energy.

At that point in my life, I was confident in my sexuality, grounded in my body — but something about touching him felt different. It felt like home. Every time he pulled me in and held me against his chest, we would both instantly soften, like two puzzle pieces snapping into place. There was an unspoken recognition between us, a silent understanding that bypassed logic.

When we made love, it was more than physical — it was like reading each other’s bodies like braille. Our movements were fluid, intuitive, as if we were dancing to the music like the most beautiful choreography. We didn’t just connect — we moved as one. To this day, even with other beautiful connections and great lovers since, I’ve never experienced that same kind of chemistry — that poetic, cosmic rhythm we found in each other.

I could feel his desire for me — his admiration, his attraction — in the way he touched me and in the way our eyes would lock like they were having conversations of their own. Despite running his own restaurant, starting his days at 6 a.m., he would still drive 45 minutes after closing just to be with me, sometimes every other day. I introduced him to a way of life he hadn’t considered possible, and he showed me the raw dedication and grit it takes to build something of your own. We couldn't get enough of each other… until the intensity of our connection started to unravel parts of us we hadn’t yet confronted.

The Runner Phase in a Twin Flame Connection

Like all Twin Flame connections shared throughout time, ours came with the runner phase. Here is Atlas' definition of the infamous Runner Phase in the Twin Flame connection:

The runner phase typically begins after the initial honeymoon or recognition stage — that time when two souls collide with an intense, magnetic pull, feeling seen, known, and completely cracked open by each other. But soon after this divine spark, something shifts.

One person — often called “the runner” — becomes overwhelmed by the intensity of the connection. It’s not because they don’t care or didn’t feel the same magic. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. The connection is so powerful, so confronting, that it triggers their deepest fears, wounds, and unresolved trauma. Suddenly, all the parts of themselves they’ve buried or hidden are illuminated. And instead of leaning in… they pull away.

The runner may ghost, detach emotionally, throw themselves into work, other relationships, or distractions. They may deny the significance of the connection, convince themselves it was just a fling, or intellectually rationalize it away. Often, they don’t consciously know why they’re running — only that being near their twin feels both blissful and terrifying, like standing naked in front of a mirror that reflects not just their beauty, but their shadow.

Meanwhile, the other person — the “chaser” — is often left feeling abandoned, confused, and spiritually gutted. It can feel like being ripped away from home after finally finding it.

But here’s the deeper truth: the runner phase isn’t a rejection of you — it’s a rejection of the self that doesn’t yet feel ready to be seen, loved, or transformed.

This phase is not punishment. It’s purification. It's the soul’s way of saying, “Not yet — we have healing to do first.” And often, both twins go through cycles of running and chasing until they each become whole within themselves. The love never truly leaves — it just goes underground to be processed, integrated, and eventually, if the timing is right, reemerge in a more aligned and grounded form.

About a month into seeing each other, he and his sister were selected for a restaurant re-design show. At the time, my excitement for life was through the roof — I was constantly catching visions of what could be, and feeling inspired by the possibilities all around me. I had a vision for his restaurant and, in my enthusiasm, I shared it with him. Looking back, I realize that might’ve felt like too much too soon, like I was stepping into a space he wasn’t ready to invite me into. Not long after that, I noticed him pulling back — hard. Months later, when I watched the episode, I was surprised to hear him pitch some of the ideas I had shared during the show. But the show made it clear that his ideas clashed with his (twin) sister’s, and in that moment, I understood more deeply just how sensitive the dynamic really was.

Long story short, he started to pull away after that — but no matter how far or how long he drifted, something kept pulling him back. And every time we found each other again, it was like no time had passed. We’d pick up where we left off, each time a little closer, a little more tender. Sometimes it would take a moment to reacquaint, especially if a long time had passed, but as soon as we would touch in whatever capacity, it all came rushing back.

I remember once, he caressed my face and I melted into his hand, tears quietly rolling down my cheeks. We both knew — as much as we cared for each other — that our stories didn’t quite align. He had deep family responsibilities. I was a free-flowing spirit. Our love didn’t have the structure it needed to root and grow, but it was real. And it changed me.

He mirrored back the shadows I wasn’t yet ready to face — and in doing so, he nudged me into a more grounded, serious version of myself. Staying grounded has always been a challenge for me, but after meeting him, something shifted. A few months later, with the support of a dear friend, I found my studio — and despite all the reasons I had to hesitate, I leapt.

I'll be honest: I almost didn't go for it. Fear, uncertainty, imposter syndrome — they all crept in. But the vision I held for the space, the intention I carried, and the quiet confidence I gained through knowing him — even for a short while — gave me the push I needed. Against the odds, I claimed that studio and poured my heart into it.

Being with him gave me the courage to show up in ways I never had before. He may not have stayed — but the fire he sparked in me did. What I once only saw in him, I began to see in myself. And that changed everything.

Did I ever tell him how I truly felt? Yes… and no.

He knew I cared deeply, that I saw something rare and precious in him — but I never told him that I believed he was my Twin Flame. He already thought I was weird, I didn't need to push it more than I did...but he did have a soft spot for this weirdo.

Sometimes I wonder what might’ve happened if we had set our stories aside — if we had let our souls collide without the expectations, without the pressure of “what this should be.” Not necessarily to end up together romantically, but to simply stay present in each other's lives, in whatever form felt natural.

The last time I saw him was in 2019. Since then, I’ve learned that he’s married now, with a child. And as much as a part of me still misses him — misses us — a bigger part of me feels joy knowing he’s found love and stability. I know, without a doubt, that he’s going to be an incredible partner and father. That thought brings peace to my heart.

Sometimes, great love stories don’t end in forever.

Sometimes they end in growth, in gratitude, and in knowing that someone who impacted you so profoundly is out there, living a beautiful life.

And that’s more than enough.

The Purpose of the Twin Flame Journey

The purpose isn’t just about finding “the One.” It’s about remembering that you are the One. And that true union begins within.

That’s something I’ve been learning to embody—bringing that sense of union into my own body, mind, and spirit first. Reclaiming the parts of me I gave away too easily. Rising into my power. Loving myself more fiercely. And creating from a place of wholeness rather than longing.

If we ever see each other again, I know it will be from that place. But even if we don’t, the version of me that was born through loving him... she’s here to stay.

She’s the one who dared to feel deeply, speak her truth, and dream out loud.

She’s the one who is turning heartbreak into purpose, grief into growth, and longing into legacy.

She’s the woman who no longer waits to be chosen—because she’s already chosen herself.

So maybe that was the purpose all along.

To remember that love isn’t always meant to stay...but it is always meant to awaken.

As you reflect on your own connections — whether with a Twin Flame, soulmate, or a powerful mirror — consider:

• What did this person awaken in me?

• What parts of myself did I discover through our connection?

• Was I trying to be chosen, was a choosing someone, or was I choosing myself?

• Where in my life am I being invited to create union within?

• How can I turn my grief, longing, or past love into fuel for my own evolution?

  
  

Remember: Not all great loves are meant to last, but they’re all meant to teach, to stir, and to help us remember who we are.

So if you’re reading this…And you’ve ever loved someone who helped you remember who you are —Even if they couldn’t stay —Let this be your reminder that no love is wasted.

Some people arrive to awaken something dormant inside us.

To mirror our potential.

To crack our hearts open just enough so the light can flood in.

I still carry the imprint of our connection,

But I no longer carry the ache.

Only the gratitude.

The growth.

And the knowing that real love always leaves us better than it found us — when we’re willing to grow from it.

And now, I don’t wait to be chosen.

I choose myself. Again. And again. And again.

Until next time, dear Lover and Muse, may you have the most beautiful day 💞

One Love!